October.

Yes.  It is now seven days into the month and I am finally blogging.
About the month of October.
In most places around the country October means the leaves have changed color and there is the first bite of a frost in the air.
In Arizona it means that the thermometer might finally dip below 100, and I put an emphasis on the word "might".
There have been some years where we were almost three weeks into October before we saw the end of 100 degree days.   Not fun.

The truth is, October is my favorite month of the year.
Not because I particularly am fond of Halloween.
But because the promise of cooler days is not that far off.
Because the best baseball is played in October.
Because I can start Christmas shopping and not feel too terribly guilty.
Because I love the smell of pumpkin everywhere.
And it's just so October-ish!  I wish I could describe the feeling more eloquently but I can't.
Plus, here in Casa de Z, October is also known as "birthday-palooza"
It is a month chalk full of birthdays....well, except for mine.
Everyone else in my immediate family has a birthday this month.
So, it means a lot of birthday cake (or cupcakes), a lot of dinners out, and a lot of celebrating!

Cheers!
And Happy October!

New.

The last few days have been a busy blur.  
My life has taken a new turn.
After more than two years of sleeping in and hanging out around the house,
I am now up at the crack of dawn again.
I am donning more formal attire (well, sort of) and heading back out into the world.
I am not quite a working girl (no, it's not what you are thinking!) yet.
But I am hoping this step takes me back into that direction.
What I am doing is something totally new and different.
I am just a tiny bit nervous.
I am hoping it works out like I want it to.
I am hoping that the last two years of hard work and study pay off.
I shall see.
For right now, I am enjoying the newness of it all.....

Comfort.

I love to crochet.
There is something just very relaxing about it.
Trying to explain this is very difficult.
And I get asked a lot why I do it.
It seems that there is a belief that something is not worth doing unless there is some tangible reason.
The answer "just because" is not good enough.
There is a snarky (no!) side of me that wants to ask my questioners...
"Why do you watch tv?"
We all have different ways we find comfort.
This is my form of comfort.
It beats the heck out of eating a whole package of Oreos!
I have not been able to crochet as much lately because of massive amounts of homework.
But, right now, when I need comfort most, I have been able to pick the hook up again.
What have I been working on lately?
Need you ask?  The most comforting type of crochet of all.....Granny Squares!
I just grabbed some of my excess yarn and away I went.
Something random and colorful.

It's still a work in progress but I like how it is coming together :-)
It is so good to be enjoying a little "comfort" again.

Granny.

This past February, my husband and I were sitting in a restaurant in Vegas enjoying a lunch.
Sitting across the table from us were our future granddaughter's paternal grandparents.
We were here in this restaurant not just to have lunch but to meet them.  For the first time.
Of course, there was the awkward small talk that occurs at a first time meeting.
In these circumstances, it was especially awkward.
Our unmarried children were having a child.
I know.  It's not an unusual event these days.
But for two sets of very traditional parents it, well, takes some getting used to.  
Anyways, at some point in the conversation, my fellow future grandmother asks me the following:
"What are you going to be called?"
Huh????????
Actually, in all honesty, this was not the first time I was asked this question.
When I told friends that I was going to be a grandma I was repeatedly asked the question of how my grandchild was going to address me.
Apparently, in the years since my parents became grandparents things have changed.
When I had my children, my parents became "grandma" and "grandpa", and my husband's parents were "grandma" and "grandpa".   It was that simple.
Nowadays, however, grandparents can pick their own designated title.....kind of like how the parents pick the child's name.  
There are even web sites dedicated to this practice.
 I found one web site called "Choosing Your Grandmother Name", and I found the following list of choices:

Big Mom (Absolutely not!)
Grams (This might work)
Mamo (Squished ta-tas! No, thank you!)
Maw Maw (Reminds me of those creepy talking dolls.)
Mema
Nana (I learned at lunch that this was already taken.)
Nanny
Bebe (A little French? Hmmmm.....)
Gigi
Mimi (Seeing a pattern here.....)
G-Ma (My husband's personal favorite)

I was just ready to throw it all in and use the old standby of "Grandma".....simple and timeless.
But then I thought about Lily at about age 3.  
About the time when she might have difficulty pronouncing such sounds as the letter "r".  
I envisioned a cute little girl beckoning her "gwanny" and I knew what my "grandmother name" needed to be.
I would be "granny".
Yeah, for all us old folks, it conjures up images of Granny Clampett with her little wire-rimmed glasses and hillbilly attire not to mention her feistiness (this I can relate to!).
But I don't care......Granny it is!
And should anyone really be surprised given my penchant for the good old fashioned granny square???

Yep...."Granny" is the perfect name for me.  

Thanks.

On a Tuesday morning about five years ago I was doing what I normally did on a Tuesday morning when I was a working stiff......
I was standing in a Starbucks.  Waiting for my drink order.
What made this Tuesday morning so different was that I was in full police uniform, all polished, pressed and shined.
At the time I was assigned to a unit that was responsible for usher duties at police funerals.
I was getting ready for a long day at a funeral for a veteran officer that had died quite suddenly due to natural causes.  
As I stood there waiting for my coffee, a fellow patron approached me and said "I want to thank you for your service."
I cannot remember exactly how I responded but I'm pretty sure that it was something like this.....
       
I shifted from foot to foot unsteadily
I said a couple of "ums" and "ahs" as I tried to think of an eloquent and wonderfully sincere response.
And in the end I was probably as clumsy as I always am in these situations.
       
The truth is this was not the first time that someone approached me in uniform to express their gratitude.
However, in true form, I have always responded in the most ungraceful of manners.
I really never know what to say.
There is a big part of me that feels very undeserving of such heralding or praise.
I've never done anything heroic such as run into a burning building or tackle an armed suspect.
Maybe there were times I put myself in harms way. Maybe.
But I cannot think of any off the top of my head.
I hear the stories of other officers and often I stand in awe of them.
There was a fellow officer I worked with that once subdued a drugged up attacker, who was trying to kill him, with his bare hands.
Yes, I do not feel worthy to be in such company.
And today, it is even harder to be an officer on the street.
Much more dangerous and so much more second guessing.
When I think of all of them, I feel like a fraud.
I did not live, eat, or drink the job.
I did not picture myself as the superhero or the first person anyone would want to come to their aid.
I never felt deserving of all the thanks.

But then when my career was over and I was more retrospective I realized something.
The people who approached me were not just thanking me.
No, it wasn't all about me.
When they offered their thanks, they were, by extension, thanking all those who wear the uniform and put their lives on the line daily.
When they thanked me, they were thanking all officers.

Today is National Thank A Police Officer Day.
And I have this one request.
If you see a police officer, make sure to thank him or her.
You will, in essence, be extending your thanks about 800,000 times over.

Home.

I needed a vacation.....a break.
A refresher before plunging back into school.
And what promises to be a demanding student teaching schedule.
So off to Vegas we went.
Where we enjoyed some of this.

And this.

And some time with this one.

In the end I am not sure it was really much of a break.
Vegas is always, well, hectic.
And overstimulating.
And extremely smoky.
Clearly the highlight of the trip, for me anyways, was Lily time.

And then we headed home.
Where my sinuses started feeling normal.
And I got my first good night's sleep in four days.
In the end, there is no place like home.

Happiness.

Lately, I've been a little down in the dumps.
I've tried (although not successfully) to avoid the news.
And I stayed away from The Facebook for a few days.
The reasons for my melancholy?
Well that is for another day.
Today, I want to focus on happiness.
Because when I get a little down....there are a few things that can always lift my spirits.
Like........

A pile of granny squares.

A relaxing day by the pool with a little lime concoction.

A sweet baby face.




A day of scrapbooking (ignore the mess!)

Happy hour trivia! (No.  I am not an alcoholic! )





At the end of the day.
There was no school work.
There was no watching the news or more specifically, politics.
There was no Facebook.
There was happiness.
Now if I could just stay completely away from the Facebook, the internet, and the tv.
I would then probably always be happy.

Summer Lovin'?????

I was in my craft room the other day enjoying some rare (as of late) creative therapy and listening to the radio.   At one point the weather person came on the air to share the weekly weather outlook.  
If you have ever lived in Arizona or even driven through during the summer, the weather forecast should be a no-brainer.  
It's going to be HOT!
But what the weather person said made me chuckle.
She said (and I quote....),  "We'll have a high of 116 on Monday and Tuesday, and a cooling trend will be coming our way on Wednesday.   The high will only be 108."
A cooling trend of 108!!!!!!!!   Seriously!  
Of course, I guess that what I consider a cooling trend is relative.  
I'm thinking that a soldier serving in Afghanistan (where it regularly gets up in the 120s) would be thrilled with a cooling trend of 108.
However, I'm pretty certain that the rest of the U.S.....well, except for, maybe, Death Valley, would have a good chuckle at our little cooling trend.  
Yes.   This is it.  Arizona life from Memorial Day to roughly the middle of October.
Yes, I said October.  
While most of the country is preparing for hay rides and feeling that first chill in the air, we still are experiencing 100+ degree days.
While bloggers across the country are blogging about the wonders of the lazy, hazy days of summer, I'm sitting in my air-conditioned home reading them and worshiping the god of Trane.
There is no sun worshiping here in August.   Well, except for my husband.....
This is how he spends a 108 degree day.  Ummmm....yes....he's crazy...

Do I think of leaving this natural sauna??
All the time.  We're just never sure when or where to go.
So we stay.  And I dream of December when it is about 70 degrees.....
And people are shoveling snow in other parts of the country.
I would hear all about this from the young men and women I encountered during my police hiring days.
They would come from places like Minnesota, Michigan, Illinois, Wisconsin, etc. to seek employment....
In Arizona.  I asked them why?
They would tell me how they love the heat because it is so much better than the winters.
Come to think of it......it is easier to sit in an air conditioned environment than to shovel snow.
But this doesn't deter me from wanting to leave Arizona during summers.
Maybe I'll consider the life of a snowbird in the future.
Until then, I will continue to love summer.....through those who do not have to endure this searing heat.

 

Squishy!

Okay, so I hi-jacked this from my daughter's Facebook.
I couldn't help myself.  Hopefully she'll forgive me.
I was just in the mood to smile.
And nothing can bring out a smile quite like cute, squishy baby cheeks!
It works every single time.  

Here's hoping that everyone is having a fabulous Saturday!

"About Me"

(Warning:  Extremely long post ahead.  Hey! Give me a break.  I've been gone awhile and I have a lot to say!)

Some time ago I added an "about me" link in my blog.
Then I deleted it.
Why?  Because I was so worried that I might offend someone.....starting with the very first line.
That very first line went like this......
"No.  I am not a mommy blogger.   I am a mid-life, menopausal woman."
It was a line that was (a) sure to discourage readership and (b) take a swap at mommy bloggers.
Oh, I don't really have anything against mommy bloggers.
I read many of their blogs.
I was just ticked off because it seemed that mommy bloggers had no use for the likes of me.
In the world of blogs it seemed you're  insignificant unless you have a child attached to your hip.

As it turned out it wasn't just the mommy bloggers.
It was also people in my age group.
Blogging, social media, and, for that matter, anything to do with computers seemed to be, well, to paraphrase, a stupid waste of time for the narcissistic among us.
I was at a dinner party once with a group of middle-agers.
When I mentioned that I was on Facebook one of the guests had no problem telling me that women our age on Facebook were all pathetic.  Ouch!  
(Yep.  If there were an Olympic event for snark, the U.S. would probably sweep the medals!)
Unfortunately I've spent much of my time justifying my presence on social media, blogging, and even taking digital pictures.  And as time has gone on I just got tired of explaining.  I let them all defeat me.
I stopped blogging.
I stopped because I listened to that "waste of time" argument.
I stopped because I started believing those people who were not engaged in the social media world were indeed smarter than me.
I also stopped because I figured who would really want to read anything I had to say.
Yes.  You read right.  I wanted to reach an audience.
I call b.s. on anyone who says they just want to "blog for themselves".  
If I just wanted to blog for myself, I'd keep a private journal.
I think on some level, we all want to reach an audience and connect with people who share the same passions, struggles, and hopes.
So, there you go.  I stopped.
And yet here I am.  What changed?
Well, this morning I woke up and did the obligatory ipad surf.
It's a normal routine...E-mails, Instragram, Facebook (yep I still go there!), Google Reader.....
And it was in Google Reader that I found the following article:

A Call to Action - for Those 50+ - Social Media is For You, Too!

I have been reading, er, lurking at this lady's blog for a while and have always enjoyed it.  
Today, when I read this article, something just clicked in me.
For starters, I left a comment on the blog.
And then I started writing this blog post.
I decided to blog again.
Oh, it's probably not going to be "one interest, one subject" type of blog.
It's going to be a mish-mash (is that even a word) of everything.
I want to tell stories.
I want to share recipes
I want to show pictures.
I want to share life.
I want to be really narcissistic and talk about me ;-)
It is really the only subject in which I am an expert.

So, in that realm, here is the new "About Me".......

I am 51.

I am a retired cop. No.  I am not offended by the term "cop".

I am a wife.

I am a mom.  My kids are both grown and carrying on with their own lives but that does not mean I worry any less about then than I did when they would dangle over the edge of the swimming pool at age 3.

I just recently became a grandmother.  I am going to enjoy spoiling her silly and sending her back to her parents.  I am also going to enjoy buying her all kinds of cool stuff like drum sets, playdoh, and any other toy that annoys parents.  Isn't that what grandparents are supposed to do???  I'm just keeping up the tradition.
Oh, and in case you are wondering, I am thrilled about being a grandmother.

I would like to teach high school math.

I am a registered Independent.  I have trust issues when it comes to politicians....and a lot of other things...

I love Starbucks.  It is the best product in the past 50 years.  Well, except for maybe cell phones and Burt Bee's Wax.

I like to take pictures.  Not just those cheesy family photos.  I like to take pictures of everything.  I am not beyond taking a picture of a simple glass of water if the mood strikes me (and there's a story behind it).

I have become a dog person in my old age.  Didn't care for dogs too much when I was younger.  But I do enjoy two of my "best friends" cuddling on the couch next to me every night.

I like wine.   Red or white.  It really doesn't matter.

I hate August.  Yes. I hate a month of the year.  Why?  I live in Arizona.  Does anyone need to ask???

I love, love and love Christmas.  I love to decorate. I love to bake.  I love to sing Christmas songs.  I love to shop.  Yep. I love everything about it.  Well,  except for wrapping presents.  I don't like that too much.

I like to crochet.  It's relaxing.  This is another thing I have to spend a lot of time defending....along with scrapbooking, taking photos, needlepoint, baking, etc.  A waste of time and money (sound familiar?).

I eat carbs (gasp!) and enjoy every single morsel!  I could eat chips and salsa as a meal everyday.  I know....really bad for me.  hmmm.

I hate working out.  But I do it.  Almost everyday.  And I will admit that I feel much better when I do.  Or actually when it's over.  I don't know if it's because of the endorphin (sp?) release or because I'm just glad IT"S OVER.  

And there they are....the cliff notes of me.  In case anyone was interested.  I bit less snarky than my original link and certainly not everything (didn't really want to write War and Peace here).

Anyways, if there is anyone left who wants to stick around, I'll be glad to "see" you.  I warn you the post will be diverse just depending on my mood.....As I said earlier...a little bit of everything.  Well, except for politics and religion.....conversations about those topics never end well.....




 

Photo of the Day: Let the Games Begin

This will be a what life will look like for the next couple of months.
My husband....camped out in front of the television.
He has been eagerly awaiting this day.
The first day of Euro 2012, otherwise known as the European Football Championships.
That would be soccer to us "ugly Americans".
In my husband's world (and the world of many, many millions) it is "the beautiful game".
I guess my idea of beauty (namely involving a ball and a bat) is horribly skewed.
Anyways, Euro 2012 will lead us up to the Tour de France.....
Which will then lead us into the Summer Olympics.
Yes, there will be plenty of couch time in the weeks to come.
I will probably join him for parts of the Tour and I know I will be hard pressed to leave the couch during the Olympics....particularly gymnastics and swimming.
And the pets?
I'm going to say they are going to be lying in those same spots eight weeks from now......

Sometimes the smallest things.....

 ..........take up the most room in your heart.

    Meet Miss Lily.
    Liliana Robin Specht to be exact.  
    Isn't she just gorgeous????
    Well I might be a little partial.....since I am, after all, her granny.
    This is my first grandchild.
    Which means she is in for a lot of spoiling from granny.
    I am so looking forward to having fun with this little girl.
    Translation:  There are times her mom and dad are not going to like me ;-)  
    Oh well.......

Photo of the Day: One Handsome Dude

Well, not only did I let the blog fall by the wayside in the last couple of months....

But also the doggie grooming.  

A couple of days ago, this guy looked like a ball of fur.  

You could not see his eyes through all the hair and he was really matted.  Poor guy!  

So, mommy finally got her butt in gear and got him to the groomer.  

So much better!  

I still have to get his partner in crime in for a haircut.  

Um....yeah....he's not looking much better.
But he's got to get shots first (shhhhhh....he doesn't know this yet)
I figure between the shots and the groomer....he is going to totally hate me.
Well at least until I pump him full of treats!

The Lost Month (s)

The last six to eight weeks of life have been a blur.  

Well....at least in my life.   

It has been a blur of school assignments, lesson plans, and calculus.  

I felt like the entirety of my life was spent in front of a computer.   

Not a lot of time for creativity.  

Not a lot of time for blogging. 

There were days that I really wanted to pull my hair out.  

I wondered if this whole "self-reinvention" thing was worth it.  

And in the middle of this flurry of activity....

My husband got an i-phone.  

Yes.....the "antitechnologyihatefacebookeveryonehastheirfaceinaphoneanditsucks" guy took a step into the 21st century.  

Now, you're probably wondering what this has to do with my "lost" months.  Where here it is.....

Like every guy, he had to tinker with this new gadget.  

Of course, he perused the app store (it is after all the first thing every Apple owner should do!).  

And what do you think he downloaded first??  

Angry Birds? No.  

Words with Friends? No

The first app my husband downloaded was the "pulse checker" app.  

Because it is so very important to check several times a day to make sure that your resting heart rate is maintaining at a steady 45.   

That is not a typo.  

He does have the heart rate of a world class athlete.  

It is just sick.   

The second app he downloaded?  

The "stressometer".   Because he wanted to show everyone (including me....several times!) that he knows how to maintain a low stress level......1% to be exact.  

This is where his new i-phone relates to my blur called April.....and May.  

He thought it would be fun to check my stress level.....while I was studying for my Calculus mid-term.  

Yes.....he did!   

It should be no surprise that my stress level was at a whopping 98%!  

What was more discerning is that a few weeks later, after I had completed all my school work, my stress level was still at 98%.  

Now I have to say that I call BS on the i-phone stressometer app, however, the whole stress level did make me rethink my whole approach to school and life.  

I mean, really, I am retired.  My life should not be this stressful.  

So, from now on there will be no more over-thinking of the school work.  

There will be more blogging time.

More creative time. 

More time to enjoy life.  

Now let's see how long I can make it last.....

Photo of the Day - Summer Sangria

The temperature hit a "balmy" 112 degrees last week here in the AZ.  Yikes!  

Did I ever happen to mention that I hate summer in Arizona?  

Well, in case you missed it, I do.   

Hate summer in Arizona, that is.  

But I did enjoy a refreshing sangria yesterday.  

A margarita would have been even better but my head has been hurting ever since the "Eat this, Not that" guy on the Today show shared exactly how many calories are in a margarita....Totally ruined them for me!  

"Drink a nice sangria, instead....full of fruit juice and nice antioxidants."  

So I obliged.  

It was yummy.   I enjoyed it. 

I even threw some lime slices in the glass so I could reminisce about drinking a margarita.  

Cheers!  

He makes all things new......

I believe in God. 
I believe in the risen Christ.  
I know not every one believes as I do. 
But I still believe it.  
It is at the very core of my being. 
It is a faith I cannot fully explain. 
But it is my faith. 
It is something that no one can take away. 

On the eve of the celebration of the risen Christ, I share this clip....
A scene from the movie The Passion of the Christ. 
This scene breaks my heart every time I see it. 
I know this is the way it is supposed to be. 
As a Christian I know Christ was destined to suffer and die for our sins.
But as a mother....it is so difficult to see your child suffer. 
Regardless of who that child is... or what his purpose may be.....  



I wish you all a Blessed and safe Holy weekend......

Rainy Days and Sundays....

This past weekend there was a very big event that occurred in the Phoenix area.....
It rained.

No, I am not kidding about this. 
It is a big event in these parts.
Especially after 90 days of no rain.  Or even clouds. 
So what do people do when it rains in Arizona? 
Well, we all grab our cameras to document this rarest of events.  Note:  See above ;-)
And in this day of modern technology the entire evening news broadcast was comprised almost entirely of photos submitted by viewers. 
I. kid. you. not. 
There were several pictures of hail....from several different viewpoints. 
Pictures of clouds.  Pictures of snow from the north country. 
Seriously. 
I'm relatively certain that people from the Midwest (you know....tornado alley) would have rolled their eyes at our freakish fascination with rain. 
In fact, there were probably a few of them in town for Spring Training. 
Anyways, I think you get the picture.  Rain is a big deal here. 
So, aside from taking the about photo I found other ways to occupy my rainy day. 
I just expanded on my collection of crocheted squares....

It was a good day for it. 
Because I knew from experience that a good rainy day is not going to come along again for a while...
In fact, today it was sunny and 83. 
And 100+ is just around the corner.....

A New Project

Yes!  There is a new crochet project. 
I don't know why I don't just gravitate to one of the five projects that I've already started.
But when I get my mind set on something, I just go for it. 
So, here are the beginnings, loose ends and all, of the next great crochet afghan (insert eye roll!). 

In between calculus homework and spring training there have been squares. 
I don't know what it is but I am so drawn to squares.....
And obviously my cat is too, because if you look closely at the the right side of the photo
you will see the kitty dutifully guarding the squares.  
The squares will turn into a big ole afghan. 
I hope it will look just as beautiful as it has appeared in my head. 
We'll see....... :-)   

Sunday Mornings

This is what Sunday mornings look like in our neck of the woods. 

Yummy waffles,

Starbucks Coffee, 
and a pathetic attempt at the NY Times Crossword. 

Nice, quiet, and relaxing. 
Easily my most favorite day of the week. 

Hope everyone is having a relaxing Sunday out there in blogland. 

Dreaming of the Simple Life.....

This morning I came to the realization that the letters H, R, and T are most likely a part of my very near future.  And I actually started a blog post detailing all the sad reasons why I came to this conclusion. 
And then I chucked it. 
Because I also came to the realization.....
That if people I knew actually read my blog I would get more phone calls than I would like
asking me if I was okay. 
I am.  Okay, that is. 
But for now I'm going to spend some time daydreaming.
That my life could be more like his......

So simple that all I thought about was fighting for a squeaky toy,
having my humans pat me on the head, and cuddling up on a nice
warm afghan sleeping the day away.  That is until the magical treat
hour arrives and I suddenly come to life.
Oh My!  If only life could be that simple......